Just woke up and felt like writing. Monsoons are here and it’s raining incessantly in Calcutta for the last three days. I prefer ‘Calcutta’ more than ‘Kolkata’ and I don’t know why!!! Listening to this song on Utube.
I woke up today at 9 to open the door for my roomie who came back from office and then I slept again. Few minute back I had a strange feeling. It is out of the world experience and I thought as Barney says, ‘It is definitely going into my blog’. The feeling is a bit abstract but I will try my best to express it lexically.
I was half asleep when in the back of my mind I started missing her. I felt like I am reliving few moments. They were not vivid or detailed or particular in that sense. It was only filled with her touch. And the odd part is I was able to feel my movement also, but my body was lying still. I suddenly woke up a few times to look whether my body changed its place but there was no movement. It felt like something inside me was stuck and wanted to come out and move around. I felt her walking beside me, holding my hands (at that moment I felt my hands were trembling). Each time I felt something like that I was out of breath and started panting in my ‘half-sleep’. My body wanted to spring but it was numb and I was unable to move. This is the first time in my entire life when I can see someone’s face with my eyes closed. Sometimes I felt her hair on my face and tried to remove it using my hand with no movement of hand whatsoever. But something inside me made the movement and moved the hair aside and the slight sensation on my face went away. Her smooth skin rubbing on my rough one gave me a tingling sensation for a long time. My head was swinging throughout the time and I enjoyed it.
I thought when it was shown in movies that it was only a pictorial representation but now that I have felt it I am unable to explain what I felt. I was hallucinating may be because last night was the seventh continuous drinking night. I called her 2 days back at 4:30 in the morning after the Hangover III just to ask her how she is as I was missing her a lot. She answered that she is fine, and asked back the same question. I lied. I told her that I have to sleep and she too should sleep as both of us have office later that day. She said that her sleep has gone completely (means she wants to talk) but who are we kidding? Both of us know that we have nothing to talk (or so much to talk that we don’t have that much time). By the way she seemed happy and I am happy for her.
PS. I am all over Srikanto Acharya. Listening to this.